Friday, June 13, 2008

No new news

Our agency does not expect any new referrals before the end of the month. I am sad to say that we have not moved in our spot since the middle of March. I am really having a hard time dealing with this. I am not sure that we will be given our referral by the Sept. deadline. Two and one half months have already passed with no healthy girl referrals to move us from our spot. My prayer is that the US will partner with Vietnam and grant visas for referrals after Sept 1 regardless of a new agreement being reached. This is the only way we are going to get our referral anytime soon, I think. I am pretty sure that every family ahead of us is asking for a healthy infant girl and that there will have to be nine girl referrals before we receive ours. But I am being trusting in what God wants for us and we will just have to see where we stand in the process by the first of August and what the prognosis is the the Vietnam program and then we will have some decisions to make. We are really limited with what to do. My heart cannot take starting over with another program that is projecting a 2 year wait period. So this is why I really hope we will get our referral from the Vietnam program. I don't want to give up on motherhood, but I am pretty much at the end of my rope right now, but I have tied a knot in it and I am hanging on with the help of God. I know Kaylee is out there. I just hope she is in the near future.
I am going to take a cake decorating class and do some other things to keep me busy for the summer and maybe on an ordinary day we will get the call we have so longed to receive. So if I don't post for a while it is because I am not motivated, but I will still be reading. I promise if anything significant happens or we move in our number I will let you know.

I really would like to know who is reading. So if you have a minute leave me a quick comment. I know you are reading because I have a gazillion visitors but I don't know who you are! I would especially like to know if you are involved in Vietnam adoption and where you are in the process. I would especially also love to know if you are a CHI family and where you are in the process. It is just time for a delurking call. So comment please, you might motivate me to keep posting!

38 comments:

Anonymous said...

hey melanie!

you know this about us...but here is the info! we are with CHI and we were with the vietnam program and now we have our dossier in ethiopia!

hang in there! i am saying big prayers for you. you have been so faithful throughout this journey...its pretty unbelievable.

grimmfour said...

Hi Melanie,
I have commented only a few times. We were a Vietnam family and we were a CHI family.CHI is a wonderful ethical agency but I think they have gotten too big. They have offices all over the country taking in applications but only one recieving referrals.Which leads to insanely long wait times.
I certainly have you in my prayers. If referrals were given for faith you would have had one a long time ago. You have been an inspiration to me at some of my darkest times. May God send you strength and healing. Lori Grimm

LaLa said...

Hey...we are a CHI family (did our China adoption with them in 2005) and we are currently with another agency doing our VN adoption. We are hopeful to receive a referral by Sept. 1st. Originally we were on the list for a healthy girl 0-12 months...after the recent announcements our agency strongly suggested we be more flexible so now we are at either gender 0-36 months. We had our hearts set on another girl but we wanted to increase our chances at making it in before the deadline. The funny thing is now I am pretty excited about the prospect of a little boy. I do still get emotional when I see things with Malia's name on them though...but who knows, maybe she is out there and in our future after our son is home : )

We LOVE CHI and had a wonderful experience with them in China. We chose not to go with them for VN b/c the list was so long. I think they should have done what most agencies did and stopped taking apps for a while...not really sure why they didn't. They are a very ethical agency and we will use them again if I can talk hubby into doing this one more time LOL

I think you know this, but we are in TN like you!!

{{HUGS}} sweet friend. God has something really big planned for you and I can't wait to watch it unfold. Hang in there!

Mark & Kris said...

Hi Melanie, I am a CHI family adopting from Vietnam. We are asking for a healthy infant boy. We are #206, so we have a LONG wait. I read your blog faithfully, but do not usually comment. We are praying for you and have been since February! My 13 year old son even asks if you got your referral yet. I can't wait for the day that I can tell him YES!! I am also a Christian so your posts are especially encouraging to me. Have fun with your cake class. That sounds fun!

Ann said...

HI Melanie, did you get my email regarding Bring Our Children Home? I know the call will come to you on a regular day when you least expect it. In the meantime, enjoy your baking class and when you can push the petition by 7/1. keep in touch.

Anonymous said...

Hi Melanie - You know about me. We're also a CHI Vietnam family. We've been in the process for just over 2yrs now, but are nowhere near a referral by Sept 1. We are hoping so desperately there is a resolution so that adoptions can continue. At the very least, hopefully the US will agree to issue visas for dossiers logged in so those families can continue while they work on a new agreement.

Although, I've started to look into what our other options may be (just in case), it's been very difficult. Both of our hearts are in Vietnam - and have always been there. It's not easy to mentally "move on", or for us to close the door on Vietnam... so, we will wait. And we pray an ethical solution for everyone is around the corner. ;)

I am so lucky to follow your journey and to share mine with you, as your faith and determination have been such an inspiration to me. You're amazing!

Hugs to you, Tina

Karen Wall said...

I am also a CHI family. We brought our son home in December from Vietnam. I am praying you, and others like you, have the chance to bring your sweet children home soon too! Take care!
Karen Wall
http://khai.serveblog.net/blog

Anonymous said...

Hi
I am also a CHI family. I brought my daughter home from Vietnam in March (Journey to me site: Yen Trang). My heart breaks for you every day that you do not receive your referral. I waited 2 years 4 months before I held my daughter and I know how agonizing the wait is. Know that all of us in the adoption community are hoping that the pogram can continue in Vietnam so all children who need forever families get them.

Anonymous said...

Hi Melanie, you know me but I thought I would stop by and say hi. I have been thinking about you every day. I cannot even imagine how hard this time is for you, and I won't even say that I understand what you are feeling right now. I pray for you daily. If it's any consolation, I do believe that referrals will continue past September 1st. I am praying that they continue and that Kaylee finds you soon.

Thank you so much for your support and prayers for our family. It takes a very special person to have so much compassion for others when you carrying so much pain as well. I cannot wait for the day when Kalyee is in your arms. What a joyous day that will be.

Oh, and we must think alike, girl! I've just gotten into the whole cake decorating thing too! I'm baking a special one for Jim this weekend. We should get together and take a class this summer :) I'm always here for you. I pray that this weekend brings you peace and love.

Brandy said...

I am here, hurting with you and praying for you! I'm not sure how far back you read in our blog, but before John got diagnosed with cancer, we were a CHI Vietnam family (if only for a short time). Our hearts are still in Vietnam, and we can't apply to adopt from anywhere for many years, so we are just sitting back waiting on God to show us where to go.

Dawn said...

Melanie, I am a former CHI family member- we ended our adoption dream, of a baby girl, this past April. I check-in with you, via your blog, daily and pray that Kaylee will in your arms soon. Hang on tight to that rope and don't give up!

heatherandseth said...

Not sure if I've ever commented, but I was previously right there with you. I started reading when you submitted your dossier, because we were pretty much on the same time frame (I thought). Our agency hadn't received any referrals in over a year and after being the the #1 spot for essentially a year we transfered to the Ethiopia program. I feel your pain, but people are reading and are right there with you. I was so hoping for a daughter from Vietnam, but our situation was a little different, because our agency was dishonest. CHI is reputable and I admire your courage and strength throughout this process.

Heather Bailey

Anonymous said...

melanie, PLEASE DON"T STOP BLOGGING! i will miss your posts too much! you and your posts are my favorite. besides, it is therapuetic...right? not just for you, but the rest of us crazy adopters.

i love you and absolutely cannot wait to see you with your baby...

jan (phoebe)

Anonymous said...

Hi,
My name is Tuyen and have been a silent reader of your blog for a while (sorry for that). I came from Vietnam so I has been always interest in Vietnam adoption. You've been waiting for so long, and I know its really hard. I will be praying for your family everyday. I hope that Kaylee will come home with har mommy and daddy soon!.

Anonymous said...

Hi,
I enjoy following your blog. I have received a referral (on March 7) but have been told that now there is concern if DIA in Vietnam will honor all referrals or just official referrals on Sept. 1. If the DIA investigation is not complete by Sept. 1, I wonder if my referral will still be complete? Oh my, the worries never end.
I pray that all the waiting families are allowed to complete adoptions. These Vietnamese children need these homes!

Take care,
Tonya
PAP to Janie (waiting in HCMC)
www.searchingforjanie.blogspot.com

Kelli said...

Oh, Melanie, I know that each day that goes by without news is so stressful and frustrating. You have been such a cheerleader for me and I am cheering you on too. I hope and pray that Kaylee is waiting for you in Vietnam. As you told me, my prince and your princess could be waiting, right now, just waiting for the perfect time to make their apperance. You are in my thoughts and prayers everyday!

Tammy said...

Hi Melanie-

I read your blog from time to time and I have commented a couple of times. My husband and I are waiting for a referral from Vietnam. We are at the 6 month mark for being DTV and have requested "either." I am sorry you have had such a long wait....your patience and trust in God is inspirational.
-Tammy

Major Mom said...

HI Melanie
I am here! I read daily and the Lord often prompts me to pray for you and Kaylee. My heart aches beyond all pain for you. We lost a baby in a Haitian adoption, and that I believe is why I relate to your pain of waiting. We moved over to an Ethiopian program and have had a wonderful experience so far. We applied in Feb, received our referral for a healthy 7 month old baby girl in April and she will be home in August. The Lord truly restores what the locust have stolen. I am believing God with you that Kaylee is in VN. I will warrior in prayer with you until she is revealed to you, wherever and whenever that is. Do not give up on motherhood, she is out there.

Brad and Fran Hoagland said...

Hi! We've met before. We are in middle TN. We were in the Vietnam program with CHI, but now we have our dossier in Ethiopia with CHI and we couldnt be happier. The wait time is about 6 months after dossier in country, so the process is much quicker. There are reasons for where you are right now in your adoption, those of which we may never know. Pray for hearing Gods call clearly.

Beth said...

Hi Melanie, it's me! You know my info, but here it is anyway...
We are a CHI family, and adopted our little angel from China in Feb. 2006. I check your blog every day, and pray for you and Kaylee often. - Love, Beth

Cheryl F. said...

Melanie,

I feel your pain. I am also waiting on a referral we are with another agency, but the silence and activity is disheartning. I believe we have babies waiting in Vietnam and that the Lord will unite us with the baby he has planned for us. I read you blog daily and you are very uplifting when I feel down. I think I may have commented before. I also live in Tennessee. When we get our babies I would love to meet you sometime for a play date. Don't give up on your dream. I have faith that God will see us through. Keep in touch. Your in my thoughts and prayers

Cheryl F
www.whattonameher.blogspot
Jacksboro, TN

Amanda said...

well, I'm not adopting from Vietnam, but I have been following you for the past few months and my heart breaks for you every time I see one of you posts counting the days waiting... Just remember that God is the creator of time and the hearts of kings are like channels of water in the palm of his hand!

Alicia said...

Hi,

I am not adopting currently but my husband and I think we will soon so I like to read adoption blogs. I started following yours on journey to me. My thoughts and prayers are with you.

Alicia

JaneMM said...

Melanie,
Please keep posting...You have been somewhat of an inspiration for many. I am with the CHI Kazakhstan program. I try to read as much as possible to keep me sane throughout this torture of waiting for the next family or me to be called. Keep busy, I too am directing a VBS next week. I love it every year. If I can provide one child with a week worth of fun and love from God, it makes the wait all the more worth while. God bless and prayers...
Jane from Western Pennsylvania

B said...

Hi Melanie,
I'm reading from up here in Ontario Canada. I've been following along and reading your inspirational posts for months...all the way back to the very beginning. I started this process in May 2006 and was DTV in Nov. 2006 shortly after Ontario's MOU was signed. I'm close. I'm likely matched. I will see his little face shortly and I pray that you will feel this same joyful anticipation before September 1st.

B

R&H said...

I try to check in often but most of the time don't have time to post any responses and my email account has had one problem after another so haven't even been able to respond to emails.
I know it's seems like the impossible dream, and that at this point it almost seems hopeless to even think about it happening because it's just seems as if it will lead to more heartache but it will happen. It may not come from the path you suspect but it will come from the right path because this journey is not chosen by you it's chosen by God. He'll lead Kaylee home.

Kelly said...

Hey girl! I just hate that there has not been any movement for you guys lately. I hope something starts happening.

Becky said...

Melanie- My husband and I are a CHI family adopting from Vietnam. We have been on the "list" for almost 19 months. Right now we are at #35. We have barely moved on the list this year. We are open to either a girl or boy. This wait has been incredibly long, however it will be well worth it in the end. I have been following along with your journey and know exactly how you feel. Thank you for being so candid on your blog. It really does help to read along with your blog and know that I am not the only one feeling these feelings. Thank you for sharing!

Jessica and Eddie said...

Hey Mel--
I think of you every day. Im hoping and praying that we do get some good news soon. You will be in my thoughts and prayers. Hope to hear from you soon. Have fun with the cake decorating-I would love to do something like that. I just don't think im creative enough. Talk with you soon. You know how to reach me if you ever want to talk. Love ya!!!

The Ben Show said...

Kelly here from The Ben Show. We were with CHI and completed Ben's adoption in September of last year. I check in every day. Your faithfulness is an inspiration.

Kelli said...

Melanie...it's Kelli (HC's mom) and am reading, praying, and still waiting.

Anonymous said...

Hi! I too am trying to adopt from Vietnam. I read your blog and love the inspiration you bring. I'm currently next in line for a baby boy with my agency (not CHI). I've been waiting a long time too, and I'm still worried that things won't be done in time.

Hang in there~

Lina

Anonymous said...

Hi Melanie,

I've posted a few times. I either post under my name or from my "Just Ducky" account. I am a parent of two girls--15 and 12 years old. They are biological not adopted--though you and I know that info is inconsequential. I found your blog through another Vietnam adoption blog--my co-worker's son and daughter-in-law just brought their beautiful baby home from Vietnam earlier this year and you were listed as a favorite on that blog. I was struck by your faith, love of children, encouragement of/for others and your daschunds (I love dogs)! I have been praying for your family ever since...and I'm hooked. I consider you a "friend" even though we don't know each other.

Thanks,
Conni

Sandra & Steve said...

I typically lurk, not post. I found your blog through another's site and was so touched by your story, your voice and your heart. I do hope you are able to bring your daughter home. We are with another agency and were fortunate enough to bring our baby girl home from VN this spring. I look forward to posting again to congratulate you on the same good news. Take care!

Anonymous said...

Still reading, still praying for you. ~Gina

K said...

I'm here too. You are all in my prayers. I hope you hear something soon.

Anonymous said...

We're also a CHI/Tennessee family - we were in the Vietnam program but have switched to Ethiopia. We hope to have our dossier in country sometime in July to begin the wait for our daughter, who will be named Alison. Your blog is so inspirational to me, so I hope you keep posting!

Kathryn said...

We are also a CHI family and currently still with Vietnam. We need to renew our 171-H before we can do a country change, if we want a free renewal. We probably won't get a renewed 171-H until about the time that we know what will happen with Vietnam. If VN adoptions, don't continue, we'll switch to Ethiopia, but we'll see what happens by then. We are open to a boy or girl and should be about #81.